Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
