pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Randomize
