Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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