She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
