the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
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