its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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