why didn't you poke me back
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
