i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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