bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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