is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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