yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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