Porn is love you can see.
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
