we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
