nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
