Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Randomize
