I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
