What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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