They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Randomize
