Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
