new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize