Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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