Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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