i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize