I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
