Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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