Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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