it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I just saw a hot homeless man
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
