first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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