i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
A+ Viking dick
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
