You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
i came on her dog
We talked him into tasing himself.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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