oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Randomize
