why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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