i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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