sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
wow bdsm is so cute
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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