Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize