Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize