have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Randomize
