I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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