I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
