I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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