go do what you do best...puke behind churches
You can't special order awesome
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize