Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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