Walk of Shame. In a state park.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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