Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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