he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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