I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
