Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
