I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
