ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
