I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
