And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
