Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Don't make out with my wife yet
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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