I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
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